WWE SmackDown! (20.10.2006)

I don't usually watch SmackDown! but when my bona-fide 100% mark of an uncle comes into my room at half-past midnight and excitedly asks "Do you want to see an I Quit match?" I don't feel like I can pass up that opportunity. Rey vs. Chavo was actually a match I wanted to see but I tend to find that with most WWE-shows these days it's not really worth leaving my room to sit in a cold guest room for two hours to see it (no cable TV in my room makes Lee and sad boy). And if I tape it, I never get round to watching it anyway after the fact. But with my uncle off nightshift (it varies week to week and I can never keep up) and free to sit up until 2am watching sci-fi and wrestling and having nothing better to do myself I like to take the opportunity once in a while to sit and watch a professional wrestling television show the way I used to watch it as a kid - cheering for the babyface, believing what I'm seeing unfold is real, and having no clue about the inner-workings of the business or the terminoligy used within it.

The show it turns out began at midnight and here's what I missed:

MVP vs. Kane

Can't say I'm upset. MVP disqualified in 2:51. I have to wonder what kind of General Manager would spend all that money on MVP. What a sucky investment.

Elijah Burke vs. Vito

Just as an indication of how little SmackDown! I've seen recently, I've not actually seen an MVP match, nor have I seen Vito in his dress, Sylvester Terkay or K.C. James and I've only seen Mike Mizanin on Raw and Idol Stevens & Elijah Burke in OVW. Elijah won this one when Terkay jumped in a booted Vito in the face.

- Matt Hardy and Gregory Helms argue and Teddy Long makes a match with Helms vs. The Undertaker for tonight.

- William Regal is ready to kick some ass and has David Taylor with him.

OK, so this is where I saw the show from.

William Regal & David Taylor vs. Scotty II Hotty & Funaki

Good timing too I might add as I was really interested in seeing this one being a Brit and a fan of Regal and Taylor. I'm kind of surprised they haven't given them their old Blue Bloods gimmick actually and although JBL on commentary really puts Team World Of Sport over, the crowd just isn't into it. More ammunition for Power Slam I guess. Hotty & Funaki get nothing in here and are completely dominated by the sheer thuggery of Regal and Taylor and Taylor finishes Scotty with a floatover butterfly suplex at 4:50. My uncle was impressed at least although it's a shame Taylor screwed his leg up the very next week and needs surgery + six to eight months off to recover. I really agree with J.D. Dunn's assessment about how Nigel McGuinness would have probably been a better choice for the spot. 1/2*

I Quit Match - Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

I knew these guys could have a great match but seeing two really small guys (one with a mask no less) trying to do an I Quit match just didn't look right. You'd expect two 6'6" monsters to be the ones brawling all over and the smaller guys to do the high flying as you're so accustomed to but their talent again outshined their stature and they put on a hell of a match. It was perfectly worked too, in the way an I Quit match should. To go off on a tangent, I help out at a small indy promotion and you've got a bunch of guys who try real hard but sometimes they just don't get it. Everyone always wants to get their big spots in, no matter how out-of-place they look, and honestly, I think a lot of them would benefit from watching this match because you've got two guys known for their high flying ability but the only flashy spots they busted out were Rey's 619 and Chavo's frogsplash, their finishers. The rest of the match was all psychology-based and built around Chavo's repeated steel-chair shots to Rey's crippled knee. They tossed in some submission holds like a Crippler Crossface from Rey and spent the entire match trying to make each other utter those two little words. As such, they were really able to convey the intensity and the emotion of the match and the result was the kind of epic fight an I Quit match is supposed to be. They eventually brawled up to the stage where they used equipment cases to bash each other with before Rey foolishly chose his heart over his head and wound up getting caught in the lighting scaffold, allowing Chavo to smash his knee to bits with a steel chair. Then smash it to bits some more. Finally Rey couldn't take any more and quit which goes against the usual nature of the babyface winning the final blowoff match but with him needing time off for knee surgery it was fine. Just a great fight and a great story that I really enjoyed. It's just a shame about most of the build-up. ***3/4

Gregory Helms (WWE Cruiserweight Champion) vs. The Undertaker

I'd say here that The Undertaker singlehandedly buried the Cruiserweight division with this needless squash of figurehead champion Helms but then there isn't really a Cruiserweight division to speak of anyway. The Tombstone finished at 2:12 but FUCK did Helms ever bust out some awesome bumps. He really made Undertaker look great and I hope Helms actually gets a chance to make something of himself in WWE because he's a hell of a piece of talent that is criminally under-used. Mid-bout, Mr. Kennedy ran-in and got obliterated too. Because you see, last week, The Undertaker cost Mr. Kennedy his United States title to Chris Benoit. So let's get this straight - the babyface costs the heel champion his title and then destroys him the following week despite having his mind on another opponent. Yep, going by WWE's logic that should set up the Undertaker/Kennedy program perfectly. Especially since Undertaker will win. Over on Raw they've done a similar thing with Triple H already pinning Randy Orton in the very first match of the brand new "establishment degenerates" DX vs. young upstarts Orton & Edge feud. Does nobody have a fucking clue anymore? Judging by TNA's Russo-inspired reverse battle royal tournament garbage the answer is "No. No they fucking don't".

- Speaking of not having a fucking clue, up next was the truly painful segment with The Miz, the Carters and some skanks Divas in a dancing competition. The only redeeming thing was JBL burying the Miz as an "annoying human being" on commentary but then it's nothing we didn't already know. Some shit happened, it went for aaages, then we moved on, all momentum killed. Never again do I want to see anything like this on my TV. I watch a wrestling show for wrestling not garbage like this.

World Heavyweight Title: King Booker (c) vs. Batista

I remember watching this and thinking "hmm, Booker/Batista's a pretty big deal to do on TV rather than pay-per-view" having completely forgotten about their stinker at SummerSlam some six weeks earlier. That's the problem with WWE now, there's nothing memorable. Everything's there or there abouts then you move on and you can't remember what happened two weeks ago because nothing means anything. Case in point - this weak effort which got all the hype and fanfare a World Title match should but then went to a DQ after six-minutes making you feel short-changed and ripped off for having sat through that Diva Dance-Off atrocity for such a meagre pay-off. Finlay did a run-in which builds an issue between him and Batista (one that'll likely be paid off on TV since SmackDown! doesn't have another pay-per-view until late December) and ECW champion The Big Show and WWE Champion John Cena get involved to move the Champion of Champions issue along going into Cyber Sunday and Teddy Long makes a match pitting Cena & Batista against King Booker & The Big Show for next week.

---

The thing I find about SmackDown! is that when you watch it after having not seen it for a while is that it tends to be quite enjoyable. I was certainly glad I watched the show although most reports online didn't seem to like it, and in actuality when I sat and thought about it, I didn't really like anything at all outside of the stellar Rey/Chavo match. I guess some time off from the product and a great match can really give you a different perspective on things. As it happens, I also came out of it kind of hyped for the tag match they set up at the end until I sat and thought about who was in it and realised it was going to be absolutely terrible. I think perhaps a little bit of my uncle rubbed off on me on that one. The fact it was Cena and Batista teaming seemed cool though (until I noticed they'd done just that some two weeks earlier along with Bobby Lashley in a much stronger on paper six-man with King Booker, Finlay and William Regal). As it happens, I didn't watch the follow-up show since my uncle was on nights and I didn't feel like going out of my way to see it or see it after the fact. Business as usual I suppose.

WWF Prime Time Wrestling (06.12.1992)

Squash matches, this should be easy. Hosts are Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan, Hillbilly Jim, Sgt. Slaughter and a debuting Jerry 'The King' Lawler.

Bob Backlund vs. Repo Man

Pretty boring although both guys are capable enough mat wrestlers. Repo wasn't far from his image change at this point and subsequent dissapearance, Backlund was just as bland as you could get, particularly for someone who was getting somewhat of an undercard push. They do some stuff, then Backlund wins with a backbridge. 3/4*

- Slick is now a reverend.

Virgil vs. Mike Kramer

The drop-in promo has Virgil putting over WWF Champion Bret Hart after Virgil's recent loss to him. To this day, I've no idea how he earnt that shot. Virgil wins.

- Promo video hypes Bret Hart.

- Ric Flair promo.

- Vince McMahon calls Bret Hart the "king of the WWF" to which Jerry Lawler takes exception. So we've got Vince to blame for that particular feud.

- Mr. Perfect sends us some thoughts direct from Minneapolis. Lawler calls him Curt Hennig by accident.

Kamala vs. Buck Zumhoff

The Harvey Wippleman/Howard Finkle feud rumbles on pre-match. Wippleman and Kim Chee bully Kamala throughout the match and Kamala tries to pin Zuhmoff with Zuhmoff on his front rather than his back. He gets it right after a few rolls. Lawler and Heenan think he needs to learn some discipline.

Marty Jannetty vs. Louie Spicolli

Yep, that's the late Rad Radford on squash match duty two years before he moved to Mexico and meant anything in the world of wrestling. What they do here isn't bad but it's just a one-sided squash so Louie doesn't really get to showcase anything or look competetive and the Rocker Dropper and top-rope fist drop finish for Jannetty.

Bret Hart vs. Rick Martel

From Sheffied, England the previous April, this is just a mid-match clip to shill a cut-price Coliseum tape. It's not a bad match so track it down if you can.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Dale Wolfe

More recycled Superstars stuff, it's Duggan and you know the drill. A clown shows up at ringside mid-match and does a trick.

- WrestleMania IX promo includes a shot of Hogan vs. Andre from WrestleMania III.

The Headshrinkers (Samu & Fatu) vs. Kevin Kruger & George Anderson

Take a guess.

- Razor Ramon in Miami rebutts Mr. Perfect.

High Energy (Owen Hart & Koko B. Ware) & Max Moon vs. The Beverly Brothers (Blake Beverly & Beau Beverly) & The Genius

Really fun match (at least on this show anyway) with six guys, each of whom is solid at worst or in the case of Owen, has the ability to make medicore guys look great. It's fairly standard stuff and everyone gets a go around with the babyfaces never looking to be in too much trouble. Fun stuff with The Genius as he keeps it simple (like a retired ex-wrestler turned manager should) and sticks to punches and scarpering out the ring the second he gets touched. Koko eventually takes the heat segment and Owen is the lucky recipient of the hot tag and he invariably cleans house with the Beverlys. That's not it though as Genius eventually finds himself back in the ring, and with both Beverlys on the outside, Owen brings in Max Moon to finish things off. **3/4

Jim Powers vs. Skinner

Well this is a tough call because neither guy means anything at this point and they each get some of the WWF's usual giveaways - Skinner gets a video wall, Powers comes out second to canned heat and they both get music. It's anyone's guess. Powers is on ICOPRO by the way. Wonder if he got the shits? Skinner even busts out some old Fabulous Ones dancing struts here which look *really* out of place and given his gimmick, completely over the top. It's a kind of interesting match in that you've got two guys who never stunk in the ring and were capable of good things but the Skinner gimmick did nothing for the career of Steve Keirn and was pretty much at the end of it's run here and Powers never really meant anything, even when The Young Stallions got their push in 1988 so it's kinda hard to care about what's going in the ring. The live crowd agrees as you've got a couple of characters with nothing going for them and nothing particularly interesting to latch onto. I mean, why hate Skinner? Why is he a bad guy just because he spends time hanging around in swamps? I think it's worth noting too that this match is from the October Saturday Night's Main Event taping (Savage & Warrior vs. Money Inc., Bulldog vs. Michaels, Bret vs. Shango) so they were probably pretty burnt out too and really, all you're left with is a couple of faceless guys doing some competent spots to no reaction for about four minutes. They do a reversal sequence then Skinner hits the alligator neckbreaker (reverse DDT) and that's that. *1/4

- Nailz addresses The Undertaker.

- Razor Ramon and Mr. Perfect trade insults back and forth.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. El Matador

Two solid workers with really not enough time to put together the match they could have done, and it seemed like Tito was on drugs in the early stages. By that I mean just a couple of marginally sloppy moments from the 99.9% of the time ultra-reliable Santana, I don't think I've ever seen him do something that wasn't entirely on the mark before. Still, when not entirely getting a headlock on straight is the biggest fuck up you've ever made, I'd say that's a pretty damn good record. The match itself is your usual skilled big-guy worker vs. smaller, skilled technician but like a lot of the squashes here, the result isn't really in doubt since Bigelow had just arrived in time for a monster push and a lot of the 1992 gimmicks (Matador, Berzerker, Skinner etc.) were being pashed out. The fact that Bigelow won was a good sign for him though given that Tito was the benchmark for your position on the card at the time. A win over him usually meant you were going to the upper mid-card, a loss and you were on a fast train to noweheresville. If you were wondering what happened when a guy went to a draw with Santana, well, Terrific Terry Taylor went to a 15-minute time-limit with him and subsequently retired. Headlocks, punches, sit-down splash from Bigelow, Tito makes the firey comeback but Bigelow's strength enables him to avoid something on the ropes and he finishes with a splash. Solid. **

Shawn Michaels vs. John Paul

No, not Triple H. And no, not the Pope either. Michaels picks up the victory and Vince McMahon suggests that he'd like to see a Michaels vs. Marty Jannetty match down the line.

- Sean Mooney is in the WWF Event Center with a promo from Tatanka. Tatanka asks for a title shot against either Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels or WWF Champion Bret Hart. You know, for a guy who went undefeated all year, that's a pretty fair request to make.

Crush vs. Brian Costello

Leg drop, head vice, Crush wins.

- Next week on Prime Time Wrestling, we'll find out the main event of the 1993 Royal Rumble, we'll hear direct on-location interviews from Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty, and Jerry Lawler will be back.

- Finally, out comes Jameson with a salver covered in dog food because he heard that King would be here. Lawler and Heenan walk off, Jameson eats the dog food. Hur fucking hur.

WCW Slamboree (19.05.1996)

WCW was a pretty strange place in 1996. A mediocre 1995 gave way to what was shaping up to be a mediocre 1996 before Eric Bischoff dipped into Ted Turner's deep pockets and snapped up the WWF's top stars Diesel (Kevin Nash) and Razor Ramon (Scott Hall) and struck gold with the nWo angle. But before then, WCW was a mish-mash of talented Junior heavyweights (Chris Benoit, Dean Malenko, Jushin Liger, Eddy Guerrero), the NWA/WCW old guard (Ric Flair, Arn Anderson, Sting), Hulk Hogan's circle (Hogan, Randy Savage, Brutus Beefcake, Jim Duggan) and anyone with a little name value signed just to spite Vince McMahon (Lex Luger, Public Enemy, The Road Warriors). The early part of the year was pretty much built around the Mega Maniacs (Hogan & Savage) vs. Dungeon of Doom/Horsemen feud and with dire consequences (see Uncensored '96). By May, Hall & Nash were in the bag but still a couple of weeks away from debuting and WCW had a pay-per-view to fill. They did that by wheeling out Dusty Rhodes' old Battle Bowl format for this show.

So the concept is this: On Nitro, 16 teams were drawn and paired off together in eight first round matches. The winners of those matches advance to the second round and are paired off until the four remaining teams go into a battle royal and winner of that gets to call himself Lord Of The Ring and earns a WCW World Title shot. Got that?

Live from Baton Rouge, LA. Hosts are Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan and Dusty Rhodes with Gene Okerlund and Mike Tenay chipping in at points.

Road Warrior Animal & Booker T. vs. Road Warrior Hawk & Lex Luger

So with the very first match WCW blows the 'random' aspect of the drawing completely out of the water by managing to pair up four guys who have been embroiled in a three-way feud up to this point (Road Warriors vs. Harlem Heat vs. Sting & Luger). Not only that, but they've managed to get the Road Warriors on opposite sides of the ring. Imagine that. Anyway, it's as punchy kicky as youd expect until the Warriors decide to just team up anyway and everyone gets counted out at 6:55 eliminating both teams. DUD

The Public Enemy (Rocco Rock & Johnny Grunge) vs. Taskmaster & Chris Benoit

Now, one match with feuding partners and tag teams in the ring together just about stretches the realms of believability, two snaps it without remorse. To reiterate - Public Enemy are a regular tandem, Taskmaster & Benoit hate each other. And the sucky part is you've got the booking mind of Kevin Sullivan, the intensity of Benoit and the ability to do nothing but brawl on the part of Public Enemy so rather than tear the house down tornado style, they get four minutes and forty-four seconds in which they choose to just wrestle. Anyway, Sullivan ends up turning on Benoit and holds him on a table so both members of TPE can crash through it. I really liked the finish and the furthering of the Benoit/Sullivan feud but they didn't have any time to do a meaningful match. 1/2*

Sgt. Craig Pittman & Scott Steiner vs. Rick Steiner & Booty Man

Again, tag team partners are drawn in the same match and this time it's The Steiner Brothers on opposite sides. And really, thats the only portion of the match worth watching as Pittman doesn't really connect with the crowd and Ed Leslie's career is firmly locked at "suck" by this point. The Steiner segment actually gets the people going and they do some amateur stuff to start before busting out the suplexes and Steinerlines. Scotty feigns an injury to cradle Rick in a nice touch but things end as abruptly as they started and Booty Man and Pittman get back in to lower the tone. You know, you've got Pittman and The Steiners who are all noted mat-based amateur wrestlers, then you've got Booty Man who's buddies with Hulk Hogan. No prizes for guessing who goes over then, although at least Rick gets the pin on Pittman with a suplex at 8:21. **1/2

The Blue Bloods (Lord Steven Regal & Squire David Taylor) vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan & V.K. Wallstreet

Tag team partners drawn in a match together four times running? Come on now. Meanwhile Duggan and Wallstreet had some shitty issue I don't care to recall but suffice to say they don't get along. And of course, Wallstreet won't tag Duggan until Duggan tags him the hard way and nails Taylor with the taped fist for the pin at 3:49. The brief section with Wallstreet and Taylor looked promising, the rest was complete and utter Duggan. 1/4*

Dirty Dick Slater & Earl Robert Eaton vs. Alex Wright & Disco Inferno

About the only match not to feature regular tag team partners and we get Disco and Alex who went on to become tag team champions in 2000 after Alex and General Rection won the titles in Germany. Confused? Welcome to World Championship Wrestling. Hot tag comes shockingly quick and Slater uses the loaded boot on Disco at just 2:56 to advance to the next round. Again, no time meant no chance of a decent match. 1/4*

Diamond Dallas Page & The Barbarian vs. Meng & Hugh Morrus

Oh look, it's a tag team drawn as opponents again. This time, the mighty Faces of Fear oppose each other and whilst everyone gets points for effort, it's not like the match was any good. The finish has Meng pinning Page and Barbarian pinning Morrus but since Page's leg was under the ropes, only Barbarian's pin counts and they advance at 5:16. I really didn't like how Tony Schiavone knew exactly what the referee's decision was on the stroke of the third count when they should have played up the confusion but it was a shitty finish either way and we'll just be glad to move on. 1/2*

Big Bubba Rogers & Stevie Ray vs. Fire & Ice (Scott Norton & Ice Train)

Well, Stevie Ray and Big Bubba have nothing in common at least. Apart from not being much fun to watch in 1996 anyway. Loads of clotheslines, Rogers and Ray collide, Norton picks up the pin at an earth shattering 3:28. DUD.

Eddie Guerrero & Arn Anderson vs. Ric Flair & Macho Man Randy Savage

Now we're fucking talking! Just take a moment to sit back and consider the quality of the guys in this one. And it's suitably wild as Arn jumps Savage and Flair charges in to help with the assult (he and Savage had been feuding for months at this point) until Eddy intervenes and he and Flair go at it. Flair then nails Savage in the chops with a right constituting a tag and drags Eddy across the ring and forcifully makes him tag Arn so Arn can beat the shit out of Savage some more. This is great. Flair then tags back in and destroys Savage himself so Arn of course brings Eddy back in. Eddy however gets an eyepoke, a dropkick and a tornado DDT so Arn comes in and DDT's his own partner as Savage jumps in and mauls Flair. This is booked like no tag match you've ever seen in your life. Arn takes out Savage leaving Flair to get the pin on Eddy (still down from the DDT) at a heartbreakingly short 4:05. Post-match, Flair brings over Elizabeth who slaps Savage and the Horseman beat him up some more. *** for the booking and the extra carricular stuff like Flair refusing to come out first. I could watch combinations of these four guys all day and it's a damn shame they never put together a Flair & Arn vs. Savage & Guerrero match on Nitro and gave them 20 minutes. Oh well.

- Time to take a break now as we review the first round. Eight matches, not one of them went longer than 8:21. Really, they had it right in 1992 with four matches, the battle royal and a couple of title bouts and everything got time to develop. Here it was just 'cram a bunch of guys together a blow through it in 60 minutes or less'. Anyway, Mean Gene flirts with some Hooters girls and they determine Fire & Ice get the bye into the finals due to the double elimination in the opener.

WCW Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko (c) vs. Brad Armstrong

Dusty and Bobby get some funny lines in this one about WCW's Spanish announce team (and they'd cracked me up earlier debating what strategy they would use if they were drawn together as a team) but the best line has to go to Tony Schiavone who talks about the 'gruelling tournament' to crown the first Cruiserweight champion (in reality it was a single match between Shinjiro Ohtani and Chris Benoit in New Japan). Ohtani had lost the belt a couple of weeks previous on Worldwide to Malenko and the title is making it's pay-per-view debut here with Brad Armstrong as the top contender. Quaint beginnigs you might say. Anyway, it's a pretty good match with all the mat work, holds and counter holds on display and at 8:25 it never outstays its welcome but the crowd isn't into it at all it's not particularly flashy or anything. If pro wrestling were a real sport it'd perhaps look like this. Manlenko took this one with an atomic gutbuster. **1/4. Rey Mysterio Jr. was right around the corner to kick some interest into the title at The Great American Bash the very next month.

Dirty Dick Slater & Earl Robert Eaton vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan & V.K. Wallstreet

By this point I wasn't really paying attention to the show so much as I was more interested in Phil Schneider's review of No Mercy which pretty much convinced me it was worth seeing. Dave Meltzer's praise of Benoit/Regal had me interested in that match but Phil's review made me realise the whole thing might be worth tracking down. Oh yeah, Duggan and Wallstreet argued some more and Eaton got a roll-up at 4:04.

The Public Enemy (Rocco Rock & Johnny Grunge) vs. Ric Flair & Macho Man Randy Savage

Mirroring the Flair situation earlier, Savage doesn't initially come out when his music gets played but this time it's percieved that it's because of the beating he took earlier rather than any kind of ego trip. Flair brings Elizabeth and Woman with him who hand out Savage's money to the crowd which brings 'The Macho Man' charging out and he obliterates Flair in the aisle and the referee just counts them out before the match even starts.

Diamond Dallas Page & The Barbarian vs. Rick Steiner & The Booty Man

Well now here's the thing. As much slack as WCW deserves for booking the least-random card they could on a show that's supposed to be built round being completely random, at least every match had somewhat of a story and consequently some interest to it. Here, you've just got four guys with no correlation and the result is just weird on paper. Schiavone spends time trying to explain how DDP could get reinstated after losing a retirement match despite not having being bitten by a snake but again, I'm not really paying much attention to this one. Barbarian pins Booty Man after an elbow drop in 5:05. Not a Randy Savage top rope elbow either, just a plain, regular, ordinary elbow drop. I guess Booty Man was completely gassed after working a gruelling 13:26 combined despite the 90 minutes rest in the middle.

United States Championship: Konnan (c) vs. Jushin Thunder Liger

And still they come. This, for those not keeping score, is our 12th match of the night so far not including the Public Enemy vs. Flair & Savage non-encounter. It starts with all the requisité reversals, flips and stand-offs that you'd expect before they build to the hard hitting fisherman busters and powerbombs. Jap-Lucha as we all know of course "rules it" but since we've only got 10 mintes to play with here Konnan on one side of the ring, we wrap it up with a title-retaining Splash Mountain at 9:30 and quietly move on.

8-Man Battle Royal: Scott Norton vs. Ice Train vs. Dirty Dick Slater vs. Earl Robert Eaton vs. Rocco Rock vs. Johnny Grunge vs. Diamond Dallas Page vs. The Barbarian

Winner of this gets a World Title shot. Read that line again then take another look at the participants. Yikes. As is with battle royals, everyone meanders around switching from body to body and punching and choking away. Barbarian dumps Page but the referee misses it and Page sneaks back in. Rocco Rock gets backdropped out by Barbarian then Dick Slater turns on partner-for-the-evening Earl Robert Eaton and knocks him out over the top with his boot. Eaton decks Slater's manager Col. Rob Parker in return and Slater gets dumped and they fight back to the dressing room. DDP dumps Scott Norton to leave the final four at Page, Barbarian, Ice Train and Johnny Grunge. Fearsome. Ice Train dishes out the powerslams but turns on Barbarian after they'd just formed an alliance which gives Page a chance to hit a Diamond Cutter on everyone and that leads to pinfalls on Grunge and Ice Train. Barbarian kicks out. Last two are Page and Barbarian who had been partners all night. Man, those guys were on fire! Barbarian comes a half an inch away from crippling Page on a tombstone piledriver but then misses a diving headbutt and another Diamond Cutter score the pin and the Lord Of The Ring title for Page at 9:36. Considering the meteoric rise Page made, Barbarian must have been kicking himself for not getting the job done on that piledriver. As for the title shot, Page finally got his crack at Halloween Havoc. Not that year's Hallowen Havoc mind, nor the next one but at Halloween Havoc 1998, and even then he had to win the most contrived, nonsensical WarGames match to earn that shot. He lost. ** Match wasn't great but I kinda liked the storyline.

WCW World Heavyweight Championship: The Giant (c) vs. Sting

With just over ten minutes of pay-per-view airtime left, we come to this World Heavyweight Title match, although considering The Giant is in it, about ten minutes is all they need. The somewhat confusing sub-story here is that recent associates Lex Luger (Sting's best friend) and Jimmy Hart (Giant's manager) are handcuffed together at ringside which comes into play later and ends up being pretty weird. Sting it should be noted isn't just here to win the title - he wants to avenge a prior chokeslam through a table that Luger recieved from The Giant on Nitro.

So Sting starts with the hit and move stuff but just bounces off The Giant a few times and Giant's obvious size advantage allows him to take over and he hits the bodyscissors which is hardly the most interesting thing to watch. They head outside where Giant tries to chokeslam Sting through a table (a callback to the Luger chokeslam from Nitro) but Luger sticks Jimmy Hart on the table and Giant backs off. Back in the ring we get a ref bump off a missed Giant dropkick and Sting hits a bunch of no-sold Stinger Splashes. Giant eventually grabs Luger by the throat until a Stinger Splash finally puts Giant down but when Luger falls off the apron, the handcuffs eventually put Jimmy Hart across the top turnbuckles. Sting then decides a Stinger Splash is in order for Hart but Hart avoids that when it looks suspiciously like Luger pulled him out of the way. The weird thing here is that Sting just gets up and splashes Giant as if nothing happened and the announcers make nothing of it but then the referee gets bumped again and Sting hits the Scorpion Deathlock leading to a spot where Luger and Hart fight over Jimmy's megaphone and in doing so, smash Sting in the head with it allowing Giant to get the title retaining pin at 10:40 (making this the longest match of the night). The stupid thing is, they chose to play up the megaphone thing as being dubious (lets face it, it's not like Jimmy Hart was ever going to out-strength Lex Luger) rather than the more subtle turnbuckles thing, and even more confusing was the fact they would continue the is he/isn't he a heel storyline that Luger had all but abandoned in order to go full blown face in time for the impending nWo invasion. Thoroughly baffling booking aside, the match wasn't awful as at least there was constantly something happening. **3/4

- Thoughts: The very embodiment of a 'holding pattern show' with a trifector of title matches in which no titles changed hands and a whole bunch of time dedicated to a tournament which meant absolutely nothing in the long run with the arrival of the New World Order. You can tell from the amount of jobbers used that WCW didn't want any feathers ruffling and things were pretty quiet giving Scott Hall's Nitro walk-out that much more impact and the effect can be seen in the next pay-per-view, The Great American Bash which features a bunch of great matches and a killer angle involving The Outsiders. Some of the stuff on this show wasn't too bad and with everything under ten minutes nothing had time to be particularly great or truly sucky and as a result it was a pretty breezy show, albeit one which felt like a three hour weekend TV squash show. I wouldn't go out of your way to see it, nor would I watch it more than once but it was kinda just there.